Resolution: Practice self-love over diet fads

Addie Graffin PHOTO CREDIT: Contributed

Addie Graffin PHOTO CREDIT: Contributed

Addie Graffin PHOTO CREDIT: Contributed

Addie Graffin PHOTO CREDIT: Contributed

Addie Graffin PHOTO CREDIT: Contributed

Addie Graffin PHOTO CREDIT: Contributed

Addie Graffin PHOTO CREDIT: Contributed

It is the new year, and I am going to take a wild guess as to what your resolution is going to be?

Does it have anything to do with weight loss or wellness? I am betting so, considering that almost 50% of the population resolutions are just this.

So, what will it be? Cutting out sugar? Cutting carbs? Intense exercise that lasts hours (or feels like it)? Will it be fasting? What about no wheat? No gluten? Shakes only?

I am betting that one of these is on your or someone you know’s lists to become healthier this year.

I am familiar because I have done them all.

My 20s included starving myself and taking supplements, lots of Diet Coke-ing and smoking to stay trim. I did, too. I was quite thin through part of my 20s. Then, I became sick of feeling shaky and heart attack-ish all the time.

In my early 30s, I decided to just starve, teach 10-20 workout classes per week, and still, I was 15 pounds more than I wanted to be.

I then became a momma, and it all changed. I gained 150 pounds in my 30s having two sets of twins in two years. I lost it all, too, and then some. I did it “healthier,” but it seemed like such a struggle — a lot of measuring and preparing food for hours on end, a lot of intense 60- to 90-minute workouts. The weight fell off, but it was just way too much work. Maintaining seemed like a ton of effort. It got old fast.

Then one day I decided, “I don’t want to do this anymore.” So, I didn’t. I stopped it all.

This should not be so difficult, this “being well” lifestyle. If we naturally are supposed to be well and live healthy, why should it be such a struggle? We came into this life perfect. What happened that it now seems to be so hard to try to find perfection again?

What is perfection anyway? Skinny bodies, thighs that don’t touch? Toned arms and slim midsections? 36-24-36? I mean, who even made this up in the first place? Barbie?

I will tell you what perfection is in the “healthy lifestyle” mindset. It is loving yourself, loving your body, loving what you do, loving what you eat, loving your thoughts, loving it all. That is perfection.

When you were a kid, you never would have dreamed about dieting for the new year. That would not even have crossed your mind. Who trained your brain to think that you are not perfect? You are perfect right now.

The simplest way to be healthy this year is to change your mind.

In telling yourself, “You’re fat, you’re unhealthy, you need to tone, you are not perfect,” your body responds, “OK.”

Can it really be that simple? Yes, it can. Once you realize how easy this can be, you will wonder why you didn’t do this years ago.

Stop saying, “This food makes me fat.” Stop saying you “should” workout. Stop saying those low thoughts and start saying things like:

“I can eat whatever I want and still be healthy.”

“I love to walk and get fresh air outside.”

“I am fit, young and alive.”

“The foods I choose will fuel me.”

“I have natural energy from sun up to sun down.”

“I am perfect how I am.”

“I love me.”

The more you practice, the easier it will become.

The catch is: You must believe it.

Do you believe eating a chocolate cake before bed will make you healthy? No, you don’t, so don’t try telling yourself that lie.

Do you believe that getting out in nature and moving your body will make you feel good inside and out? Yes, you do, so do more of that.

Trick question: Do you believe slaving away at a workout and starving will make help you lose weight? Yes, you probably do, but does it feel good? No, it does not. So, don’t do that.

Remember, we are only doing things we love and that make us feel good this year.

To sum up:

1. Talk nice to yourself.

2. Do exercise you love — only.

3. Eat food that tastes good (and feels good).

4. Envision yourself at your healthiest and happiest all day long, and soon, you will become just that.

5. When a thought of “less than” your highest self tries to creep in, you must “clear, cancel and release” that thought immediately, and go back to your thoughts in number 4.

Here’s to 2021, ladies. May you be well in mind body and spirit. May you see yourself as perfect inside and out. May you become your very best friend.

Addie Graffin is a freelance columnist and blogger based in Platteville, Wis. Read more at

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